Sometimes I really get caught up in all of the little things that make me worry. I can always, always find something to worry about. It seems like if it isn't one thing, it's something else. Poor Marcus. It drives him crazy the way I worry, but I swear I can't help it! (And I try to tell him it is part of my responsibility as a mom...but he isn't buying it. Someone please back me up!)
So I used to have a job, and I didn't really love it or anything, but I was good at it. I knew what I was supposed to do, and I did it. I would always get it done and I always did it well. I worked from 8 to 5, and my days were predictable. So now, instead of a job, I have a baby. And you know what? Some days I don't feel very good at it. Some days I don't know what I am supposed to do, or how to do it. And it makes me feel CRAZY! I get so stressed out, and I worry about poor little Asher, and his schedule, if he's getting enough to eat (hah!), enough sleep (and at the right times), if he's warm enough/cool enough, and on and on.
And to make matters worse, Asher had his first real cold this week, and things were a little crazy at our house. And that is when I worry even more. I worry about his snotty, stuffy nose, and if he's going to be able to breath. I worry about his little cough and I worry that he's going to get sicker. I worry if he needs to go to the doctor? Or I worry that he doesn't. And our schedule goes out the window and I'm not very flexible. So then I just get stressed.
And then yesterday I had a few really eye-opening moments. I visited two brand, brand new babies. Each one week old. And they were darling, and oh, so, TINY. And I realized that Asher is not tiny anymore! And it made me just realize that life is passing by so quickly, and I just really hope that I am soaking all of this in.
And my sister texted me and asked how I was liking being home, if I was sick of the "mom" stuff or if I was loving it. And I had just been complaining that all I felt like I did was dishes and laundry! But WHAT was I thinking? I get to stay home with my baby and play with him all.day.long.
Life is so good! I have the sweetest little baby in the whole wide world. He is healthy. Oh so healthy and growing like a weed. And not to mention cute too. I have a wonderful husband who thinks the world of me and completely takes care of us. I am so blessed.
I really hope that I am living in the moment and noticing every last thing about baby Asher. I hope that I am noticing his cute little toes, even his little toenails, his chubby belly, his throaty giggle, and every single last thing about him. I wish that I could take pictures of every second of every day, because things are changing so quickly and I don't ever want to forget any of this.
Life is good.
7 comments:
AMEN to everything you said...and seriously he is ADORABLE
Totally agree. Ditto to everything. You know how much I worry...and yes, it does come with being a mom!! Being a mom is the best/hardest thing in the whole world and I don't think anyone can truly understand that until it happens to them. Love you!
Love this. It is so obvious that you are such a good mom and that that little guy is SO loved. Isn't it funny how we just can't help but always be worried about something? And I'm not even a mom! Love you guys! Can't wait to see you TOMORROW!!
LOVE these pictures! He is such a doll...and a BIG doll! :) I know, it all changes and goes so quickly....
Well it looks like Marcus and Andrew have one definite thing in common: crazy wives that worry. :) I related to everything you said in this post. I swear if it's not worry than it's the next...and being a parent is a never ending whirlwind of worries.
Two weeks ago I found out that Madsen needed surgery at Primary Children's and I was an absolute wreck! I worried myself sick for two days and then once it was over and I could see that everything was going to be ok I couldn't believe how crazy I had been. Everyone around me must have being thinking "Get a grip!" It was as if I didn't think he would make it through surgery or something. Every possible bad outcome circulated through my mind and I failed to even think that the outcome would very well be good. Anyway, I'm learning to accept that I have always been a worry wort and being a mother just adds to the craziness. Sometimes I just wish I could turn my brain off and relax. :) But life isn't easy, is it?
Oh Chelsea I remember feeling all those feelings when Brooks was just a few months old...wait a second, i STILL feel all those feelings! ;) It's incredible how we momma's worry...from thinking about our babes sleeping, and eating enough...to learning enough words, and getting enough veggies along with their mac & cheese...to who they'll date (good, sweet girls pleeeease??). I loved reading this post, and could tell how much you love your little boy!!! You have the right perspective, soak up the sweet time of being home with him while he's still little <3
And what a beautiful boy your Asher is :)
I think you're in good company, Chelsea! I was worried ALL THE TIME with Sophie. I've chilled out quite a bit with Jameson, but I still stress when our routine is interrupted and I have to remind myself of what's most important. You're doing great!
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